I haven’t been writing so much. It’s not because I don’t want to. Lately I just haven’t been feeling that inspired about how to inspire others. Which basically means i’ve been over-thinking it. I always have something to say, so it’s not that I have a lack of opinions on topics. I guess I have just been thinking about how to spin it in a way that will have a call to action or a clear benefit…when really I just need to write. Practice makes perfect.
There has been a lot of change in my life. And a lot of transition in general around many aspects of my life. It seems that I am supposed to learn something from this. Actually, i’m sure that I am supposed to learn A LOT of things from this, but the one that seems most appropriate is as follows: Follow Your Intuition.
In retrospect, I have noticed that having a strong work ethic has inadvertently put me in a place where I have always just done my job, and done it really well. Regardless of the hours, regardless of the negative speak that was directed at me around mistakes, regardless of the sacrifices I had to make around not focusing on my health and family. I have been so accustomed to focusing on the outside, focusing on making sure that everyone else had what they needed and making sure that my reputation was intact as a doer, as someone that could be relied on at all times (which really isn’t a bad reputation to have).
But what I was creating was a life that is built on perfection. In that life, I put so much emphasis on what other people thought of me instead of focusing on what I thought of me. When you’re so intent on pleasing other people, and not hurting their feelings, you do a lot of things that don’t honour your authentic self.
I have been in a state of flux, not really sure what to do to move forward. Feeling inadequate and lost and also worrying about what other people thought of me…and even what my ego thought of myself. I received a coaching session from a good friend of mine and he told me that I strive for excellence (a really great quality!), but to be careful, because I frequently toe the line between excellence and perfection, and perfection leads to judgement and feelings of inadequacy. No one is perfect.
So true. I’ve been chewing on that for a few weeks. (Interestingly enough, i’m a virgo, and that is one of our traits. For years I have told myself that it’s just the way that I am – nice excuse).
And so comes this issue that has been in my face for a while – deciding where to place my priorities. I have been focusing on things that took me away from building my coaching up and although there were many lessons I can (and have!) learned from those opportunities, those distractions haven’t felt right since day one. SINCE DAY ONE. I remember my intuition telling me that it wasn’t the best move. But I ignored it. As I felt confused, I talked about it with another friend, and she said something I already knew, but in her text voice of clarity, it hit me like a ton of bricks:
“Will you regret not doing this in 5 years?”
Suddenly it was like a big weight was lifted off my shoulders and I felt as light as a feather. It was clear that it wasn’t something I was going to regret at all. I was going to regret not focusing on my business, mastering coaching as my craft and getting serious about my future.
I could have avoided all of this if I had just followed my intuition and answers from prayer from day one (silence and introspection is key for me). If only I had really listened the first time…because really, i’m back to where I started from in the first place…albeit a little wiser.
So I ask you this: are you making decisions based on other people’s goals, thoughts and aspirations for you? Are you not in a habit of listening and searching for what would work best for you? I challenge you today to start building a habit of being true to yourself – it may be meditation, prayer, making a pros vs. cons list, journaling or even talking to your closest confidante, friend, spouse or family member (but make sure they are listening, not really giving advice). Whoever or whatever it is, I encourage you to start doing it so that you can start to flex your intuition muscle so it becomes stronger as you grow. Then, as the answers come to you, just do it. Feel the fear and do it anyway.
If you are having trouble with where to start, and really want to start achieving your possible, living the most authentic, happy life you can, and say goodbye to all the negative issues in your life, contact me! I’d be happy to chat with you about your positive next steps. As a life coach, i’m your cheerleader, and I want to help you get to your best.